Sunday, November 28, 2010

Old Jewish Jokes

There's something appealing about old Jewish jokes. Who wants to hear some?

-Guy's sitting in the exam room waiting for his test results. Doctor comes in and says, "Well Mr. Rudin-". The guy cuts him off. "How much time do I have left Doc? Just give it to me." Doctor says "10-". The guy cuts in again, "I can live with that". Doctor finishes, "9...8...7...".

-In the locker room:
"How long have you been wearing a bra, Harry?"
"Since my wife found it in the glove compartment."

-A guy gets home pissed drunk from the bar and falls into bed, mumbling about golden toilets. The next morning his wife says, "You know, Joe, you kept saying 'golden toilets' last nights. It was pretty funny."
The guy says, "No, no. It was really true. I had the most wonderful time in a bar with beautiful golden toilets." His wife just says, "Uhuh".
Now he's on a mission to find the beautiful golden toilets. He calls one bar after another with no luck. After two hours, he finally calls up an upscale club far outside of town. "Hello, do you have golden toilets?" The woman on the other end says, "Yes, come on in." She hangs up and calls down the hall, "Jerry, I found the guy who peed in your sax."

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